I am here to inform you that I might not be able to update more offen since I’m moving to a new house (no internet). So, I already post a few scheduled post (as usual) for you guys to read up. Hope you don’t mind. I’m kind like tired of everything but yet my brain couldn’t sleep. Long story short I just couldn’t see any road and lights. I see blank. Just forget about my rant. I don’t really want to put much emotion type of post. Back to the topic “Is all about me“. Well, people’s may describe me as lansi (very ego) or cool type of person for their first impression of me. Sometimes I am really cool (I couldn’t describe it but is true) I am also a person who won’t open my heart to anyone. I guess some of my friends try to know be better via communication. But please don’t judge it as simple as you think. I don’t know why I want to share out over here. Maybe I should. This is my blog, why not?
1) I will never ask people go out with me
-because I was afraid of rejection
-never in my life feel this way (University life = suck)
-to ask some help, I really need so many days to think or until last minute to seek for help
(maybe because I always get what I want and my parents will fulfill it for me, simple as ABC)
2) I have panic disorder until today
-I don’t really want to go into details “what really had happen on me”
-Doctor diagnostic me from d + a + ed + p
-I am battling until today, I’m surviving
-panic can happen anytime, anywhere
-I might get panic even it was a small problem. LAME me
-the place that I will always avoid –> library, night market (shit place), crowded places (except for mall), even exam!
-maybe you could read up more about panic attacks here (she is one of my favorite blogger)
– oh, I really want to thanks to X because she is the one who bring me out from the dark.
3) I don’t talk about my issue or thoughts to anyone
-I am not a type of person like mother = daughter = best friend relationship
-So most of the time I keep everything to myself
-In term of friends, I hardly open and tell them this and that
-Is very uncomfortable (most of the time) for me to answer their question about..
4) I must remind myself that I cannot repeat the same mistake
– Friend Zone (lazy to describe)
– “Treat people the way you want to be treated”
– Very often people who gossip to you will end up gossiping about you (beware)
5) Too much to share out actually.
– I’m kind like tired
– I wish to sleep like a baby